077 Casual friends
077 Casual friends
It's possible to have lots of communication but no connection.
The influence of those around us is powerful. Good relationships permeate into other areas of life making them better, while bad ones make them worse.
Yet, most people put more conscious thought into the color of their smartphone case than the people they surround themselves with.
They overlook the power of relationships, and burn time with casual “friends” they're getting nowhere with.
Casual friends are not really your friends.
It doesn't matter what you call them. But the reality is that those people who give their casual friends more than a casual amount of their time—they stick with those kind of relationships due to insecurity and a comfort zone that gets formed around their circle.
They can't be alone so they'd rather exhaust themselves fitting into a group they can be a part of—just not to be alone.
It's possible to have lots of communication but no connection.
You can choose to disassociate or limit your association with certain kinds of people. Finding whom to do so with is your play.
Will they get offended? Maybe, maybe not. If they are simply people you'd kill time with, and not really deeply connect with—they most probably won't care. So that can't be an excuse.
And even if they do get offended, you've got limited time. You want to spend it on people and things that help you grow, keep you productive, make you happy—not suck out your energy but add to it.
The Amazing Things & Ideas List
1. A few books I’m reading
– Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
– Never Finished: Unshackle Your Mind and Win the War Within by David Goggins (audiobook version!)
– The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins
2. Podcast I’m absolutely enjoying
This 4 hour long conversation (with one of the raddest people I know of) was a total blast. Jocko and Andrew discuss plenty of interesting topics. Even if (for whatever reasons) you’re not interested in specific things, they just might make it interesting to you.
3. How I’m reflecting on the past year
I’ve found Tim Ferris’s ‘Past Year Review’ a pretty neat way to think about the previous year and build from there instead of coming up with any resolutions for the new year.
4. Be bold this year
“Fortune sides with him who dares.” — Virgil
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Onward,
Arjun